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I also like how you use the introduction to give a good preview of the experience you are about to relate. Readers like knowing what to expect. : )
Your introduction does a good job of setting up the experience you are about to narrate, but I think your conclusion could be developed slightly more. The conclusion for a narrative essay usually explains how that experience is meaningful to you. In other words, how did this dieting experience play a role in your life in the years ahead? How has it changed you and your approach to life? Do you now know something that you didn’t know before? I think adding just a couple more sentences to that conclusion, Wendi, will do the trick...
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