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Drawing from personal experience, I find that I am the one who introduces myself and gets the conversation started. For instance, in the college social scene, people are thrust together and I find that I do not know many people. I once went up to a guy in the corner of a room and said, “You’re not going to meet that many people in a corner, so I guess I’ll have to do the work for you”. He laughed at the obvious icebreaker. I introduced myself and we ended up talking for a good portion of the night. The conversation was not completely focused on either one of us. Contrary to Tannen’s views, I was first to introduce myself and make sure the focus of the conversation did not shift solely to one person...
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